Lost in Lannaland

The Blockbuster Biotch

2006-08-15T11:38:00.000-07:00

So while at blockbuster the other day… renting “Inside Man”, starring my boyfriend Clive Owen, I got one of these looks, from the clerk….

In fact, the conversation began as such:

The Blockbuster Biotch -“Oh, when are you due?”
Me- “December”
TBB – INSERT “LOOK” HERE “Are you having twins”
Me - GIVING MY OWN “SPECIAL” LOOK … “no”

Perhaps I should let this go… she made a mistake, an error of judgment – people do that (well, I haven’t, but that’s beside the point…) and she clearly did.
But why am I not letting this go? At first I thought it could be because I DO look like I’m having twins… but then reality sets in, and I am CLEARLY not. Perhaps it is because she was squinting through the ugly and everything becomes blurry at that point… but that’s just not nice. Or perhaps, in some small way she did it. She is one of those few people that penetrate through the layers and knick off a bit of the old self-esteem, and this process is the regenerative stage. Either way Clive will have to touch me nice to make up for it.

p.s - the Blockbuster Biotch wasn't half as cute as that red-headed girl - i was just being the bigger person by making her look better.

The phallacy of the urine test

2006-07-27T14:49:00.000-07:00

When pregnant you have many different tests to take, the majority of these are blood and urine tests – the easiest being the urine test… This happened to a friend of mine the other day…. Okay it was me. I have no friends…

Its never easy having the urine test sprung up on you- especially when you don’t have to go. However, I have to say I am quite proud of my body’s ability to produce in an “emergency” situation.

So I sat down, cup in hand, and thought hard about going. Now, perhaps its just me, but there is a certain sitting difference when you are planning a short and long-term stay on the potty– most noticeably the location of ones pants.

During a short stay, my pants do not usually pass the knee. Why should they? I am only stopping momentarily. If I were to hang around a bit longer they would undoubtedly pass the knee… for manageability sake.

Anyway, I sat down cup in place – prepared for a “quick” pee. (Pants above the knee) So for some reason it NEVER occurred to me that the pants and underwear combo, which were binding my knees together, would become a direct hindrance to my right hand, currently wedged between my legs, holding the cup… and yet they did.

Not 2 seconds into my stream did I realize that this “wedge” factor was not going to work, so much so, that in shear claustrophobic panic I suddenly realized I needed far more room - and that my pants were the only thing holding me back from comfort.

Needless to say, I un-wedged my hand and forced my pants over my knees in one hasty swoosh…unfortunately at the exact same moment I freed my knees - I also freed my pee.

Oh yeah and I was still holding the cup.

I don’t think words can adequately explain the odd combination of watching your pee dribble down the doctors’ white restroom wall, and the horror of realizing you now need to refill your cup.

However, I will admit I was now much more comfortable and able to contemplate my present situation.

5 mins later i filled my cup...and cleaned the wall.

The moral of the story, don't be lazy, especially if your peeing in little cup and you don't have a phallus advantage ...bastards.

Just another day...

2006-06-20T12:26:00.000-07:00

Okay, so one month she tells me I’m getting to fat, the next she says I’m losing too much weight… I am NEVER going to win with this doctor. Doesn’t she realize that my swimming has contributed to my new “svelte” body – and if I work this all out accordingly, I could physically gain enough weight for the baby – BUT – At the same time, by swimming, I could be toning the body AROUND the baby and lose weight – so much so - that by the time I have the baby I could come out of all this looking very hot and thin.

…A girl can dream can’t she…

In other news… I have this wedding to go to in July…yes, a wedding in July, how unpredictable…Anyway, so I have this wedding to go to, and I need something to wear – I guess the world prior to my pregnancy has never really thought of creating a nice/hot maternity dress – or least they don’t sell them in stores, they are elusive. You have to hunt them like wild elk – not very easy when you live in the city… they hide behind buildings, instead of trees. So…apparently, what has been all the rage previously is that matronly look – blah!

So I decided to take this matter into my own hands and find a pattern – Unfortunately, the pattern maker people are also on the ugly train. Three hours, and a billion pattern books later I did find something. Which needs a bit of “lan-provement” , so the dress will black, naturally for a wedding…and as I already have some awesome Indian-inspired shoes that are red and beaded with hints of gold, I decided to pair it (not that I am a ribbon around the middle kind of girl…but desperate times…) with a ribbon I found that matches perfectly! – made in India, and it is red and beaded. So yeah me.

Hopefully all will turn out well – I’ll keep you posted….

The Predicament….

2006-06-01T17:35:00.000-07:00

Problem… I’m due Dec 17 2006 – okay that’s not so much the main problem.

Main problem… Ronnie Burkett is coming to town (I haven’t seen him since 2001) and I have been waiting patiently for him AND his marionettes to come back - and they are!!!

Root of the problem – He will be here Dec 4 –17 2006….

Solution- I am still going.

I don’t care what you say. UNLESS you have seen him in person – you can have no say in my goings on. RONNIE BURKETT IS THE GREATEST PUPPETEER IN THE ENTIRE WORLD!!!!!!

Baby will have to wait. We will have a meeting on Monday and discuss his coming into the world…. I will win…. because I said so.

http://www.johnlambert.ca/english/ronnie/ronnie.htm

NOT cool...

2006-05-31T11:13:00.000-07:00

Yes… so this is how I have been feeling lately – for the second day straight! Now I heard a rumor that you are only suppose to be icky the first three months, and after that you feel fine again. Perhaps I missed the memo… perhaps I am just more special than the rest of the world – or perhaps this little sucker has it backwards and he just started pushing the sick button now… not cool – NOT impressed... And we all know how I feel about cats…and yet THIS is how I have spent most of my mornings.

Must stay in shape

2006-05-29T15:20:00.000-07:00

Okay, so some of you, knew that I was busily staying in shape by going to my “low-stress” aquafit classes, and some of you...one of you.... wanted to see photos…

Well, as I am always obliging I will submit one.

As you can probably guess I am the one looking very nonchalant on the right. Yes, I am to good for aquafit, but yes, I do look good doing it.

Okay i've been on sabbatical....

2006-05-29T13:25:00.000-07:00

Yes, I do apologize for the delay

I have been absent for a few months, not because I don’t love you… well, some of you…but because I have been busy. It was tax season, and then there was May, and you know how May can be recouping from April, and now June is close upon us – where did the time go…?

Oh… and I got knocked up, yes, the secret is now out officially – I could thanks some family members for sending word out a little TOO early – but we won’t go there…that was enough drama for one year…

So yes… I’m preggers…weird – you may start sending presents out accordingly.

Okay… so I have the first sonogram pictures – very exciting – as you can see little Clivey looks just like his daddy….

Baby pictures

2006-03-24T11:33:00.000-08:00

WTF- Here they are... my baby fry. Actually it was very nice that all six turned up for the photo in their baby crib (AKA the isolation booth). And high five for actually taking a picture of my tank -its not easy getting them all together, smiling like that. They seem about 2 weeks old in size, still a little to small to move in with the adults, but big enough to be to start showing their shape…very cute. Paternity is yet to be determined as fish can hold fertilized eggs up to three months in their bodies – so I have no idea who she was with – the slut. We will just have to wait and see when they get a little bigger.

Lesson 1

2006-03-23T16:10:00.000-08:00

Okay, stop what your doing and rent this movie, then go out and watch Earth and Fire. I'll wait... And once your finished that, go out and read A fine Balance by Rohinton Mistry (another Canadian BTW) Then we will talk, and then we can be friends. Good day

I got the skinny

2006-03-20T17:31:00.000-08:00

Like others before me, Scarlet O'hara, the Von Trapps...Carol Burnett - I too have made a dress out of curtains....

However, unlike my predecessors, mine did not evolve out of necessity, in fact, it was made possible by surplus.

The Blanket was finally finished, I had logged hours of Gilmore Girls, and I was spent. Yet, it was not until its completion that I had the great idea to add a panel of fabric to the reverse side my little creation. With exactly what I was looking for in mind, I went to fabric land.

Word to the wise- never go to the fabric store knowing exactly what you want – you will NEVER be satisfied. So after a good hour of walking around with bolts of assorted fabrics, adding and dropping bolts, and then adding and dropping more bolts… I was not happy. That was until I made it to the curtains… and there I found something, closer, to what I wanted, a little more red, a little less white, a few more colors… but I was satisfied none the less.

That was until I got home.... and everything I had envisioned was not working – it is not an easy undertaking sewing over crochet – I don’t recommend it.

SEW, what do I do now (haha…okay not that funny)… i had all this fabric, to much for a small purse, and not large enough for curtains...so I dug around through my old patterns, and found a cute little slip dress that would work perfectly, excluding one minor detail – I am no longer a size 8.

Problem 1…was I ever a size 8? Why would I buy a pattern I could NEVER fit into to… when was I a size 8? …Grade 7 ? …Kindergarten...?

Solution for problem 1 - I was a size 8? Wow, I never noticed… yeah me.

Problem 2… that sucks, I never got to appreciate size 8. I never got my full skinny recognition…

Solution for problem 2 - Who cares, I was a size 8 at one point in my life, I can now adjust my drivers license weight accordingly.

Problem 3- I still liked the pattern, so what I essentially did was cut an extra 2inches around the entire pattern, (giving myself 4ish here and there) and I began to sew…

Wah lah… I can now say I am, again, a size 8.

okay... i added more than 2 inches on either side -minor typo - completly on purpose

New Arrivals

2006-03-18T11:41:00.000-08:00

Okay, its been a bit since my last entry.... i am just waiting because blogger isn't uploading my pictures due to maintenance, and i am eager to share some pics of my finished blanket and latest project...

but in the mean time

WTF - We've got babies!!!!
Yes, i guess my balloon molly before she died must have given birth to babies, and they (the ones that have survived) have grown just big enough to be noticed. Therefore i am their new serogate mom. We have sextuplets...perhaps a sign of things yet to come....?

Home

2006-03-10T09:11:00.000-08:00

Last weekend the hubby and i went for a short but sweet visit to Calgary (in on Saturday out on Sunday), and it occurred to me, while I looked out the window, and watched the morning fog rise up over the ocean – I knew was home. Nothing beats the feeling that you love where you live, and you always have a place to come home to.

Okay, that enough introspection for one day...

WTF- One of the Balloon Molly's was swimming upside down today.

Yes, i do talk to fish

2006-03-08T13:38:00.000-08:00

New babies for the tank, three new Spotted cory catfish, three red fluffy fin things, and two dwarf puffers...who were returned two days later... they are fin eaters - Bastards.

I even got a ph tester (to check my water - not that doubted its quality) and i'll have all of you know, my water is PERFECT. I now answer to the title "Lanna, fish whisperer".

I'm awesome again

2006-03-01T16:01:00.000-08:00

Okay, so i guess i don't completly suck... i did another whole row -yeah me!- thanks in part to season two of the Gilmore Girls. See, they DO bring happyness to everyone.

Never finished

2006-02-28T17:06:00.000-08:00

Okay, so my procrastination isn't fixed. I was so proud of my progress on the blanket i took some time off... okay i got sucked into the abyss that is Chapters and bought a billion books to add to my already stacked book pile. Its not my fault, knowledge is power - who am i to argue with that - i like power, therefore i buy books. Now, if i could stop procrastinating i would read some of them...okay after the blanket...hey did you see that thing on the tv?....

WTF- So i finally get the water clear, the ph just right, and everyone alive is swimming happily...and i find one Dalmatian molly dead today. Irritating, it's like the horse you train to eat nothing. You work you heart out everyday feeding it less and less, and one day, after months of work, you have it eating nothing and the blasted animal up and dies on you.

I will be adding new fish on monday...

Todays helper

2006-02-24T08:57:00.000-08:00

Crochet buddy Nessie…So this whole idea of doing little bits at a time to trick myself into a larger project has so far worked out very well. True, I have only two rows done – but hey, this is only week one, usually a feat like that gets completed by week 5 or 6, so high five me. I even went out and bought more yarn, for the little red bits. That yarn, sadly, is not a lion brand yarn and is some other kind that isn’t half as soft but makes up in the color department. It’s called Tomato, and goes very nicely with the Mediterranean yarn, isn’t that interesting…
WTF- Two down, but the leftovers seem happy…

Squares

2006-02-22T09:17:00.000-08:00

Before and after season one of Gilmore Girls... see, i guess there are ways around a short attention span, only 4 more squares to do :) (its 5x5 now instead of 7x7...okay so i guess i'm not completly cured...)
Before After

New Blanket

2006-02-21T10:34:00.000-08:00

Happy Tuesday everyone, I am crafting away crocheting a blanket. Generally my problem with crocheting has been attention span. I don’t have one. Thus I am resigned to make scarves. They are quick, simple and only take up a few hours –depending on their size- and no matter what point I am in the making process I always seem to feel half way done, which tends to curb my weak attention span.

So a blanket sounds like a masterful feat- especially for someone like me. So I found a solution – not a new one, on the grand scheme of master plans, it wasn’t like I came up with the cure for attention spans while I was thinking, but I did find a diversion – the light bulb went on – well, it clearly flashed, at least for an instant. It doesn’t have much of an attention span either…

…what was I talking about? Just kidding – actually that reminds me. You know when you sneeze? You supposedly lose brain cells. – its true, I asked Jeeves. Anyway, sometimes I wonder which ones I lose. Like a memory cell, which little memory did I just forget with that spray of snot? I’ll never know. I’ll never be able to remember it. Poor thing, lost cell…but I digress

So I am crocheting the blanket out of squares, like patchwork. Okay, not like patchwork – it IS patchwork. That way, each square is like a completed little project...49 little 10-minute projects. So I figured it out, that if I did seven squares a day for a week, it would very close to completion.

Needless to say its day four, and I have 13 squares done

. Here is Seamus helping me. The photos don't do the yarn justice, it's called Mediterranean from Lion Brand homespund and you can't tell from either picture, but they are really nice greens, tan and a rust color.

WTF – Spotted Cory stuck to the filter…

Staying Alive

2006-02-18T08:38:00.000-08:00

WTF- For the past few mornings i have neglected to tell you about one of my dalmation mollies. I'm sorry, i didn't think you could handle it - but now its just getting silly.

Every day when i go to feed the little faction of marine life, i notice that one of them, is either floating at the top of the water motionless, or he's down under a plant motionless. And every morning, or should I say mourning, (k- not funny…yes, it is) i declare the dalmation mollie is dead. I get the little net out, dig in, search around, scoop - and the next thing i know -the little bastard swims away- completly freaking me out. Do you know how much it takes to psych me up every morning to flush that little guy - okay, not much- But if i haven't had breakfast yet, i need at least a minute to get over the dizziness of getting out of the chair, and that could be, like, 10 whole seconds. It's really starting to irritate me.

Needless to say, its been yet another morning, and everybody is -apparently - A-Okay

Happy Valentines....

2006-02-17T09:07:00.000-08:00

Okay, it’s a day late and a dollar short. But I have been busy. Made a trip to the aquarium, not mine - the bigger one - which, yes, has been confused with mine a few times - the main difference being I don't charge $17 to see it. Mine costs $10.

In other news... Valentines worked out very well, husband is taking sock dog out for walks regularly....AND, I got season 1-5 of Gilmore Girls - my husband is so good to me. Okay, he didn't actually buy it for me, he got me a gift certificate for Amazon - my other favorite place in the world- my first favorite place being, of course, at home watching Gilmore Girls...geez.

Note to self, do not buy crafting books online anymore - they all suck. Remember previously my ordering of "Super Crafty : Over 75 Amazing How-to Projects!" ... not so cool. In fact, crap. I won't even go there, it’s not worth my time....who makes fertility shrines? ...Ok sorry, I said I wouldn't...

BUT THE REVIEW SAID THE FOLLOWING "...With its sleek design and edgy tone, Super Crafty is the ultimate hipster’s craft guide, with a wide array of accessible projects suitable for all skill levels."...What I got were pasties, shrinky dinks, fertility shrines, sweater sleeves cut off to make dog leg warmers, and clips on chains to hold your sweater closed- PAAA-lease. No high five for you. I now stand by my already strong opinion – THERE ARE NO GOOD CRAFTY BOOKS OUT THERE FOR PEOPLE WHO DON’T LIKE TEDDY BEARS, GINGHAM, SCRAPBOOKING, TOLE PAINTING, AND OTHER COUNTRY CRAP. –Yes, I went there, I said it, and I’ll say it again - country C-R-A-P.

Maybe I have to make my own craft book…start a crafting revolution...I’ll hand out flyers - made of hand pressed paper – without flowers in it… I’ll make my own little crafting revolution t-shirt with a potato stamped Che Guevara… I know there are more of you out there, scrapbooking because you have to – because there are no other crafting magazines. I know about you women… one stroke painting their chairs while watching Donna Dewberry infomercials at 3 in the morning; I feel your pain, put the brush down, it will be okay. Take down your matching Mary Engelbreit print wallpaper, border, curtains, towels, placemats, floor match, tea set, dishware and tea cosey. You may not believe me right now, but it will be okay. It will be okay. You do not need to live in craft hell anymore… Its like an addiction, you won’t realize how wrong you’ve been for so long until its over… put the brush down, one stroke isn’t the answer.

WTF- All quiet on the aquatic front…

where was i, oh yes "If you lead i will follow, anywhere that you tell me...."

Found

2006-02-14T11:29:00.000-08:00

Okay, so i found the Gourami stuck to the filter this morning.

WTF-I believe someone felt to guilty to come clean about the whole affair, so they decided to replaced the dead gourami with a decoy dead gourami. It's sad what levels people stoop to these days.

And they thought i was just paranoid...

Services to be held 6pm

2006-02-13T17:51:00.000-08:00

WTF - At work on Monday... one missing gourami...as of yet no has fessed up to the flush...

$4.99 REWARD

Missing 1 pink and neon blue spotted Dwarf Gourami fish. Approximately 3" x 1.5" in size, including tailfin and only has one long barb on his left side. Answers to the name "Gourami Fish" sometimes... well, usually if said while dropping fish flakes... okay, has yet to actually answer to the name- But worth a try if you see him. Missing from tank Monday 13th of February 2006. Green mesh net found mysteriously in the bathroom...

I wonder how you contact the milk carton people...

Needless to say, i made a trip down to Petsmart to test my water - which by the way is very good, except a little heavy in the nitrates - not uncommon for a new tank, it just needs to finish cycling...maybe I should find them all little bike helmets.

For safety sake...

the new arrival

2006-02-10T15:29:00.000-08:00

As always, my babies are brilliant from the start...

"float"

"Stay"

"play dead"

Good Sock Doggy

Solution

2006-02-08T15:07:00.000-08:00

It takes 2 socks to make one sock dog. He will never notice.....That is until i present him the sock dog for valentines day. Not only are they his favorite woolly socks, but how can you not love a sock dog? high five Valentines day...

WTF - the london fog has rolled in...

Missing in the washing machine?

2006-02-07T19:37:00.000-08:00

I was thinking about making a sock dog.

Problem... no socks…well, no "clean" socks. I could make a dirty sock dog, but then he would be a bad dog. A bad and dirty sock dog that tracked mud through my house…hummm, I already have one of those...

Solution #1... husband has a nice clean wooly socks....
Problem #1...he likes those socks

Solution #2...I could take just one...
Problem #2...he would notice after putting on the other one

Solution #3...Bad dog eats one, thus we must sacrifice the second

It's a little cloudy in here

2006-02-07T19:27:00.000-08:00

But hey...WTF...we're all still swimming

It's a fact

2006-02-07T16:31:00.000-08:00

The Sea Otter, now the cutest animal in the world (aside from my own of course). The Sea Otter tangles himself in seaweed. Why? So he won't float away while taking a nap. Yes, you may say awww now.

This is why hours in front of the TV is good for you... you learn new and interesting things all the time.

Nessie and the Sea Otter seperated at birth... probably not... but you may awww again.

The Crunchy, Crunchy

2006-02-07T15:01:00.000-08:00

Project Tin Blanket Tea Cozy is not unlike "Project Runway" in a lot of ways...
We both work on a budget, sew straight on into midnight, parade our latest creations and I happen to look a lot like Heidi Klum...okay, so i'm not blonde, tall, thin or have a German accent, but we both wear Victoria Secret underware, I just buy mine on clearance.

And not unlike Project Runway, I finished my little creation in time and under budget ($2.96). I get top marks for ingenuity and resourcefulness. The tin blanket works wonders for keeping the little puppy warm for long periods of time. It’s true I didn’t go outside the box design wise, but I did make sure it was tall enough to cover the Rooster tea pot as well as wide enough for the Brown Betty, so high five for fitment. When it came to the runway, little cozy took a stumble. Well, more of a crunchy, crunchy. Audibly, the little tea cozy is a ruckus maker. In all my planning and resourcefulness, factoring in temperature, geographic climate changes, global warming, condensation data, I never took into account the “crunchy, crunchy”. In all its beauty and perfection, it is still marred. Oh great wonder, thou art scarred by tinfoil!

Actually, I’m being a tad over dramatic, the cozy kicks ass heat wise, and who really carries it around with them enough to care about the crunchy, crunchy… well, it IS a good cozy, maybe I’ll will bring around with me…the crunchy, crunchy will announce my arrival, I can see it now… “Hey look its Heidi Klum”… no…wait its LANNA!!!

Morning meeting

2006-02-06T09:06:00.000-08:00

WTF -We're all still alive.

Drama, drama, drama

2006-02-05T13:00:00.000-08:00

WTF- okay, so everybody has survived the weekend...almost. I guess you shouldn't keep two males gouramis in one tank...needless to say one gourami is missing part of his tail and dorsal fin...I now have two new dalmatian mollies, and one, lonely, gourami. Well, I guess that’s what happens when you don't play nice with others...

In other news, I am going to make a tea cozy today. My mother has the best one in the world ever. I thought if I told her how much I totally loved it, I would guilt her into giving it me. No such luck. So I guess I will have to make my own. Now a best in the world ever tea cozy does not really sound that hard to make – but it is. Not design wise, in but its functionality- it must keep the tea HOT! HOT! HOT! And no simple inner insulation base of quilt batting can do that.

Hummm… perhaps if I cut up one of those tin foil blankets that people lost in the Andes use to keep warm while waiting for the rescue plane… you know that’s not a bad idea.

You know what irritates me..?

2006-02-03T20:00:00.000-08:00

Elbow patches. Who wears out an elbow? I have been wearing shirts my whole life, and never have i worn out an elbow.

One fish - Two fish

2006-02-03T17:59:00.000-08:00

I have a tendency to kill fish… by accident mind you…so that doesn’t count does it? Since our shop has been open, roughly a month, I have gone through 10 fish in our little tank. Now I didn’t kill all of them, I returned 4, 3 died and 2 mysteriously vanished…Only one little baby platy, whom I have raised from a millimeter survived. I will call him “Nonperfishable” or Still alive for short. Well, Still alive for short has been swimming happily for over a month now, completely over the trauma of loosing all his friends and family. At roughly a centimeter in size, I though it was time he got some new buddy’s. So I went completely against aquarium etiquette and instead of introducing a few fish at a time, I brought home 8 – I made sure everybody had a friend. I have neons, guramies, yellow ballon molly's, a spotted cory catfish and Still alive for short. I am thinking about crocheting sweaters for all of them. Actually, you know what I would really like to do? I would like to have a big field full of sheep. And in the winter, I would shave their fleece and knit different colored sweaters for all of them. I think sheep would like wool sweaters. I would. Nobody knits me sweaters… okay, that’s not true. My mother did once; she started when I was 5 and it was finished when it was 20. It was also teal. I got to picked the color out… it was the ‘80’s. Thanks mom.

But I digress… so I have fish.

I was thinking keeping everybody updated on their lives with a countdown to death, but that might be a little morbid. I figure I am just being realistic. I know my fish track record, and I am sure they will all die. Eventually. In fact, I have it on good authority that we all will. But to remain the optimist I will call it “Watching the Fish” or WTF for short. Not be confused with the other WTF, and yet they both fall under the same guise. Interesting.

WTF – so far so good

I'm covered in balls... hairy, hairy balls

2006-02-02T19:25:00.000-08:00

I have hundreds of balls of yarn. I am literally swimming in a sea of tread, slowly drowning in my inability to sit down and do something beyond scarves and baby blankets, both are small, and made up of straight lines, require no great ability on my part and I can express my creativity - not through my inability to crochet beyond the straight line but through but ability to pick a good yarn ball. (Lion Brand kicks ass) As a result, I pick them up when ever I see a good one. Unfortunatly, I am starting to get the feeling my efforts are going unappreciated - I don't know any babies, and I think my dogs are tired of wearing scarves...
…I didn't pose them like that that’s how they chill. Those are "candid shots" I snuck up on them...think of me as puppy paparazzi...

I can't knit, because I don't have the patience or attention span for it.
I gave it up when I was 6, before i had the chance to bloom as a knitter. I quit mid-stream, partway through a parka. Barely beginning to sweat knitting a sweater. I was indifferent to my mother’s teachings I was uninspired. To be honest, there is too much to invest to get into it. You need two needles as oppose one crochet tool thingy – see I don’t even know what it’s called! Its all a sham...I'm not even a real crocheteer (I think I invented that word…). Look at my abilities…ONLY scarves - ONLY blankets - All straight lines, no skill, no drama, and yet, I collect yarn...balls and balls of yarn. I think I need an intervention.

New Favorite tea!

2006-02-02T17:46:00.000-08:00

Okay, i am not really a "plugger"
BUT THIS IS THE BEST TEA IN THE WORLD EVER!
I especially like the Tropical Green Tea. Each little bag comes in these crazy tea bags, that you have to feel to understand - I found them in the supermarket they are a little pricey, but worth every sip. http://www.revolutiontea.com/

New Toys!

2006-02-02T17:17:00.000-08:00

Up until today day this picture has been my world, drawing with a mouse sucks- and I know I am WAY hotter than that!

So I decided to shop around a little on the Internet and see if I could find a pen and tablet and thrust my computer artistic skills into the year 2000. The last time I checked around they were about $200...and I couldn't justify that amount because I could be depriving myself of the possibility of finding a great pair of shoes for the same price.

So yeah me today! When I was shopping around on Amazon and found one for $84! Completely under my $100 budget!

Now between you and me, Amazon and I have this secret thing going on...don't tell my husband... but I think he's catching on every time he pays the credit card bill.

I have a wish list, and I was just checking to see if it was sill there while I was checking out, and added on a book for $16. However, on Amazon you have to spend $25 to qualify for super saver shipping, which means I needed to add in a CD that was $9, and since my math is bad, I had to add in another the book I had just discovered today called "Super Crafty : Over 75 Amazing How-to Projects!" It sounded cool...we will see.

And as I am sure you are totaling every up right now in your own noodle, and yes, as I was checking out I did realized that the Waccom tablet had already qualified me for my super saver savings… but, I had already added in the books, and imagine the time it would have taken to delete them here and re-enter them back onto the wish list...probably hours, but more like seconds... so I got them.

Needless to say it is, only a few hours later and my Waccom tablet is now on the way (with the books soon to follow in another random shipment).

So high five to new adventures in computer drawing...I’m sure there is a way cooler technical term for it, but I only just entered this technological world, so give me a day or two to master it.

Frida and Cigar Box Purse

2006-02-02T12:19:00.000-08:00

So here I am... still pondering the batik quilt, yet surrounded in cigar box purse supplies. The hardest part being, of course, the idea. I NEED A THEME... needless to say I know the answer to this questions, as the little puppy is already finished... but lets pretend here people.

Hummm... batik quilt...cigar box...batik quilt...cigar box...batik quilt...cigar box... are you with me...?

Okay, I didn't make a batik quilted cigar box, because as we previously discussed
Michael’s sales associates are ignorant to the crafting industry... or at least to me and my crafting needs, which ever came first.

So I was on the India train of thought (oh to go one day... my dream of dreams...) chugga chugga - train noise...get it. never mind. And I was thinking about doing a Ganesh themed box, as he and I have a lot in common, and I have a little shrine to him in my house - we go way back. And as I was pondering color, I was feeling Cobalt.

And who knows Cobalt better than Frida Kahlo? ...uhmmm, like no one! So a new Frida purse it is. I found tons of painting on the internet which I printed out, and I have a little booklet, full of obscure black and white photos that came in a card and envelop set, which I never use, but bought for the box.

I hesitated to use the printed out pictures on regular paper, as I thought they might bleed and look terrible, but they worked great! And there is an endless supply of images on the net - so high five me!

Making the pictures and everything work together in a cohesive manner IS the hardest part of decoupage. I will say, however, my pieces de resistance are the two little skulls I put on the handle in celebration of Mexico’s Day of the Dead -made out of fimo and antiqued from the silver foil kit – hello! See my spending is coming in handy all over the place. I new upgrading would work out!

And there it is, a little accessory, here and there, and it’s done. I marvel at my own craftiness.

Now to concur the world of batiking…

New Fancy earrings

2006-02-02T11:42:00.000-08:00

I have started to like buying odd colors of things like a weird orange, or a strange green something/anything -because I find when I do, that I end up likening it a lot more later. The color, or the object ruminates in my noodle, and the color permeates into the cracks. It makes me happy.

For example, these earring I just made, with the packet of silver hoops i bought - that’s like 10 presents!… To me!

I found these pinky/coraly - strange- colored beads on sale and bought them on instinct. I liked their oddity, and now they have become these lovely earrings.

Crafting note: to make these...

Un-bend a silver earring hoop, chuck a bead on the end and bend in into the new shape you want. I will suggest making the part that goes into your ear flat, because if you are going to make tear shaped design and the pointed top will be in your ear, it will push out and look funny. I walked around a whole day before I realized the pointed bit kept poking out... thanks world for letting me know.

P.S Yes, those are aweful pictures... i can't be good at everything... okay i can - it was the cameras fault.

My love/hate relationship with "Michaels"

2006-02-02T11:07:00.000-08:00

The Evil Empire

Strange how they all look alike isn't it....

Why I hate Batik.... okay I haven't actually started to batik yet - but I spent over $70 at Michaels and walked out with NOTHING that will facilitate my new batiking passion.

Instead.... when I asked the sales associate for batik paste (read about this in an Australian crafting mag - you can actually use a batik paste, instead of wax, on your fabric and then wash it out - apparently very easy and it turns out really good...) she gave me one of those what the hell are you talking about looks- which I get all the time and can recognize in an instant. Four other associates later, and i am clearly out of luck. - Which is also not surprising, because the more I go to Michaels (the once crafting supplies Mecca, now really only caters to mainstream crafters - the scrap bookers - the beaders - and all the other people that only craft with pompoms, pipe cleaners and foam board) the more I think about it, the more I realize they carry nothing useful.

I made little flower angels for Christmas this year, made with leftover white silk roses from my wedding in 2002. All I needed to complete the little masterpieces were wings - ANGEL WINGS! - and do you think Michaels had those in stock...oh, the suspense...they didn't. Instead, I just got one more of those stupid looks.

Anyway, I digress.... so they have nothing... and yet I spend...

So while project "Batik" is on hold, I wandered around aimlessly waiting for inspiration... and $70 later, I found some.

I walked out with a great packet of silver earring hoops about 20 for $4.00, some beads that were on sale for 50% off - regular $4.99, a cigar box, i always wanted to try making a cigar box purse - It was only like $6.00 so how could i not... this is what propelled the rest of my spending, because now i NEEDED...

-A handle
-Some paints about 7 - but I only used 3
-Some silver edge pieces
-modge-podge
-Sealer - the big one, because I might use it again...
-Silver foil - it looked fun...and if I bought the set I got, a base coat, adhesive, sealer, and antique
-Foam brushes - but a variety pack of three was way cheaper than just the one

How that all added up to $70, I may never know... sure I could look at the receipt...but who does that while spending frivolously?

Brilliant idea of the day

2006-02-02T10:59:00.000-08:00

On the odd occasion, I have a moment of pure crafting brilliance. Usually the light bulb goes off while I am doing ten things at once, or don't have a pen to scribble it out. Or I do have a pen and I write on a bill stub, or on a napkin that later sacrifices its life to the washing machine. Lately, my answering machine has been getting a lot of cryptic crafting messages only i can decipher..."Batik! Lanna, your brilliant, today your are more brilliant than you first ever realize! A Batik genius!" The code, of course, meaning that I am going to learn how to Batik - and not just regular every day kind of batiking... I am going to make a quilt. High five new idea!

Come in we're open

2006-02-01T17:16:00.000-08:00

Hello, and welcome to Lannaland that strange and wonderful place were i live in the meantime. Sure, the new paints not up, and the pictures are not hung, but we are here... crafting away during the in-between time of busy and stuff to do.